pieces of ria

Turning a new page.

2011-03-28T01:16:00.000-07:00

So I've decided to turn a new page and start over today.

New week, new mindset, new goals, healthy eating, more water, less thinking, more doing, less dreaming, more writing, less wasting time, more getting things done.

Including more exercise.

I'm taking the next three weeks for myself and I'm going to make a few visible changes.

{If you want change, choose it.}

I'm choosing it...

Sharing.

2011-03-27T13:08:00.000-07:00

I wanted to share a few links with you on this calm Sunday night. Herewith some blogs that I read on a regular basis.
I love them, maybe you will too?
It is only the tip of the iceberg, though.
There are lots, lots more.

Rockstar Diaries

The wild and wily ways of a brunette bombshell

A cup of Joe

Pacing the panic room

Make things happen

Happy reading!

Winter on the coast.

2011-03-01T00:31:00.000-08:00

I'm back and a lot has happened. I'm now a lecturer and I teach people things. It's unbelievably rewarding to go to 'work' and to know the possibility is there that you're making a difference in someone's life.

It has also been hot. Way too hot... Almost unbearably hot. And I've decided that I want to live on the coast in an area where it's mostly autumn/winter.

{I want cool, misty, wet days somewhere where it's green and quiet and beautiful.}

Somewhere where it looks something like this:

A girl can dream, right?

A few truths for a Tuesday

2011-01-24T23:29:00.000-08:00

... but not all the time. :)

(Now where did I put those matches...?)

Sleep is absolutely great for you.

(...although I haven't been sleeping too well lately...)

I sometimes wish I had red hair.

If the permanency of tattoos didn't freak me out as much, I would probably get one similar to this.

I will be OK with a permanent holiday.

No, honestly.

I wish I could take better pictures.

It really is all in the mind.

{trust me on this one}

images: all somewhere on weheartit

The people you love.

2011-01-18T11:06:00.000-08:00

image credit: drifterandthegypsy

{Tell them that you love them every chance you get}

x x x

2011, so far.

2011-01-17T11:33:00.000-08:00

There are a few reasons why I don't get around to blogging this year. The main reason is because I think I have too much to say, and I'm not sure how to say it. And I want it to come out right. So I wait. I wait, wait, wait, on myself, on the right feeling, the right words, the right time... And all this waiting gets me nowhere :) Today I leave you with this gorgeous picture and a few reasons to feel good. Because if all else fails, you need to remain thankful. And sometimes a picture speaks a thousand words.

A few of my reasons to feel good:

My new Amazon Kindle. It's got a red, leather cover and I'm going to spend hours holding it and drinking in every word it has to offer.
My pregnant cat. I can feel her babies move in her tummy and it makes me uncontrollably happy and excited.
My new business cards. I have never had a business card.. it feels kind of good.
My husband. He's great. He's calm, he's real, he's honest and true and we love each other unconditionally.
The fact that I survived last year. I'm still here, I'm alive, I'm blessed, I have so much to get excited about and I should grab everything in my life with both hands and hold on for dear life.

Image credit: Pinterest

Hello, 2011

2011-01-04T22:08:00.000-08:00

This is what I'm planning for 2011:

Think less and do more.

Don't over-analyse.

Spell better, run more, worry less.

Be at peace with who and what I am.

Believe in myself.

Remain thankful and pray constantly.

Let's see if I can manage that!

{I'm going to try really hard!}

For some reason it's been harder than previous years to get all excited about what lies ahead, but I'm in the process of changing my attitude. Just so you know. :)

A strange, hot summer - so far.

2010-12-10T07:39:00.000-08:00

I found this song yesterday and it did something for my soul. I thought I'd share it.

It's called This Moment by Nic Chagall Feat Jonathan Mendelsohn

Listen to it here

And I wanted to say that it's been one of {those} weeks.

{thinking.too.much.all.the.time.analysing.overcomplicating.planning.but.waiting.thinking.contemplating.wishing.thinking.considering.evaluating.expecting.anticipating.conceiving.projecting.analysing.}

(And all of that takes time and a lot of energy, and I have no idea why I do it. Someone once told me it's called intellectualisation- maybe he was right, maybe not ;)

But, today is Friday.

And I have a weekend to myself.

So, let's see what happens...

I love Paris.

2010-11-30T05:30:00.000-08:00

Oh, if I could be here

for a few days,

with him

I would be really happy.

{a girl can dream, right?}

A thought for today.

2010-11-29T23:04:00.000-08:00

Goal for the week.

2010-11-28T23:07:00.000-08:00

This week,

image: scatterheart

I am going to

{DO MORE}

image: milajessica

and

{THINK LESS}.

Another Monday.

2010-11-28T23:00:00.000-08:00


*image credit: margeauxklein*

So today is Monday and I have a sudden urge to change something. I want it to be different from the past few Mondays I've experienced. I want this week to be different from the past few weeks I've experienced. What shall I do?

Change my routine? (Ha, what routine. I don't exactly have one at the moment!)

Maybe change my hair colour. It's about time.

I'm going to put up a Christmas tree and decorate the house. That will be a nice change!

{I'll post a picture when I'm done :)}

Big cats.

2010-11-15T00:27:00.000-08:00

image credit: skylighters

We spent some time at the Spier Cheetah Outreach over the weekend and I had the privilege to touch a cheetah! I love cats and it has always been a dream to have an encounter with a really big cat.

The cheetah I met was male and around eight years old. Joseph was born at the Ann van Dyk Cheetah Centre on 30 May, 2002 and hand-reared. He came to Cheetah Outreach with his brothers Kaya and Bryon at 3 1/2 months of age. Since then he has been an essential part of the awareness programme, greeting visitors both at the facility and at venues throughout Cape Town.
Joseph is owned by Wild Wild Wild in Africa.

image credit: http://www.cheetah.co.za/

(pictures of me and Joseph to follow soon!)

Friday prettiness.

2010-11-12T03:33:00.000-08:00

image credit: andreaferrari

image credit: flickr

{Beautiful.}

Wondering.

2010-11-12T01:51:00.000-08:00

image credit: imstillgonnashine

I spend too much time wondering.

Wondering and thinking, about life, about people, about situations, about what has happened, about what is happening, about what might happen. Instead of just living in the moment, I'm mostly in another time frame - in the past, in the future.

I intellectualise.

I analyse.

I project and plan and evaluate.

All the time.

I spend too much thinking that I end up doing less.

Does that ever happen to you?

A dedicated writing spot.

2010-11-11T02:34:00.000-08:00

I recently dove into my picture archives (I keep folders filled with inspiring pictures found on the Internet) and found the following (sources unknown, unfortunately):

My idea(s) of the near-perfect writing room:

Aren't they great? I can picture myself in any and all of them. Imagine having a room dedicated to your writing (if you have one, I'm jealous). A room filled with all things inspiring. Bookcases filled with your special collection of favourite books, dictionaries in every language your heart desires, artworks which gives you goosebumps every single time you lay eyes on it. Walls painted in any colour you want, be it a deep, reading room red or a deep olive green. Maybe the room has a window or two, overlooking a lush garden - or better yet, overlooking the ocean. Imagine that! Imagine being able to hear waves crashing on rocks or the wind move through a forest, right below your window.

A place where you can let your mind wonder and where you can come up with magical combinations of words. A place where you move off into another world, a world created by your imagination, an alternative reality.

I like to think that if I had a special writing room, I'd write more often. Contradicting that is the fact that I also believe that if the time is right, you'll write whenever and wherever you are, regardless of the setting.

Maybe I should re-arrange our (small, yet functional) study (with the amazing red wall)...

{Love}.

2010-11-08T04:59:00.000-08:00

It only happens once, not twice

the moments vanishing like mice

scurrying past, life is much too fast

And only for the very brave, the strong , the true

And when the moment’s come for you

Don't let it pass you by, for in the twinkling of an eye

the love is gone, the moment’s dead

an empty ringing in your head

Your heart will know when fate has whispered in your ear

Oh never fear!beloved friend, for in the end

its worth the price, the fee, the cost

When all is lost and love is won

When true love comes , there is but One.

- Danielle Steel

Thought for the week.

2010-11-01T02:35:00.000-07:00

I {love} my cats.

2010-10-27T08:14:00.000-07:00

We have two fantastic cats.

I have written about Basil and Chilli before.

Sadly Basil dissappeared a few months ago, but we were lucky enough to get a new kitten.

I called her Butternut.

She is fat, plump, round. Call it what you will.

But she is also the most lovable cat I've ever met.

She talks to me and follows me around in the house.

I'm never alone.

She's like a baby and I {lovelovelove} her.

I have time.

2010-10-25T00:00:00.000-07:00

image credit: zachee

image credit: doreese

image credit: debbiegardner

This week I will have enough time to do the following:

Finish up my terminology list, at my leisure (it's only due on Friday)
Read a book (any book, because I want to, not because I have to)
Get a grip on our house (think: rearranging cupboards, cleaning, maybe moving a few things around)
Exercise
Reconnect with a few friends (even if it is over email)
Plan my outfit for the Halloween party (on Saturday)
Think about things (this I do anyway, most of the time)
Maybe finishing up our wedding album
Spend quality time with my mom and sister and brother
Spend quality time with my husband {love}

Guess what.

2010-10-20T11:28:00.000-07:00

I only have two days of classes left.

And a terminology list to compile.

Then my year as a postgraduate student is over.

{Can it be?}

Clouds.

2010-10-12T06:45:00.000-07:00

I have a thing for clouds.

These pictures were taken last night just before my plane landed.

Up there you feel closer to God, no matter how you look at it.

Clouds are ever-changing; one moment here, one moment gone.

Their colours are amazing.

I wish I had wings to fly up and spend more time {close} to them.

A little bit of perfection.

2010-10-05T13:14:00.000-07:00

When I saw this picture, I couldn't stop staring.

I can see myself spending hours in that bed.

I will surround it with books, enjoying the light it's flooded in.

I can imagine smelling the scent of sweet jasmine drifting in through the glass doors which opens onto the big, lush garden.

And when night falls, I would open the doors even further and listen to the sound of crickets and the people I love having a conversation outside in the cool evening air.

I'd slowly fall asleep and dream of fireflies, cherry trees and a never-ending happy, dreamy summer.

{IwishIwasstillalittlegirl}

And then I had a haircut.

2010-10-05T07:12:00.000-07:00

{yes a change is as good as a holiday!}

There I am

2010-09-29T08:08:00.000-07:00

image credit: weheartit

See that lost little speck of a person, yes right there, in the middle of a big, scary ocean?

That's me.

Right there.

{ThisishowIfeeltoday}

Just a thought.

2010-09-29T08:02:00.000-07:00

image credit: weheartit

I love what I do.

2010-09-16T06:29:00.000-07:00

image credig: weheartit

I want to write about how much I love what I do. Let me start at the beginning.
I took a big risk at the beginning of 2010.
After much thought and deliberation I quit my job (which I really didn't like - it was the last of a string of not-so-great jobs I've taken which were leading nowhere) and slid back into the world of being a full-time student.
Yes, a full-time student.
How great is that? And this at 30!
I still feel very lucky to have been able to make this decision. My career was going nowhere and I felt it was time (at last) to further develop the skills and talents I was given.
It was time to do what I actually want to, to do what I was good at.
So I enrolled for the Postgraduate Diploma in Translation course at Stellenbosch University. I passed the entry exams and before I knew it I was sitting in a class filled with like-minded people with a passion for words.
It was nerve-wrecking at first and I suddenly felt unsure of my abilities, but I soon got into the swing of things (read: constant, hard work, stress, time management, having to study after more than 7 years of not doing so).
I reevaluated myself, my life, my career. It was a fabulous journey of self-discovery which wasn't always easy but I now realise how valuable it was.
And I was broke!
I had to adapt to being the church mouse student I once was. Very few luxuries, very little shopping. And look, I've survived!

I love working with words.
I love editing texts.
I love proofreading - every second of it.
It excites me.
It gives me a wonderful feeling of accomplishment and fulfillment.
It boosts my confidence.
It gives me hours of pleasure.
It keeps my brain alive!
And yes, sometimes it is tiring and stressful, and I don't feel like doing it.
But that's normal and just the way life goes.
Suddenly this year is coming to an end and a bittersweet feeling blew in with the Spring breeze.
I really hope to find a job which will give me the opportunity to show what I've got.
I am good at this; it's my passion.
I just need someone to give me a chance to prove that!
I feel grateful when I look back at this year.
It's been a fantastic ride!

{That's why I love what I do and I feel lucky.}

Six months today

2010-09-13T12:45:00.000-07:00

We've been married for six months today.

It keeps on getting better.

The love keeps growing stronger.

My smile keeps shining brighter.

{I'm a lucky girl.}

I love yellow at the moment.

2010-09-13T12:39:00.000-07:00

image credit: lovelyclusters

I {love} yellow. Every single shade.

I would paint a few rooms in my house yellow, if I could.

I once had a pumpkin yellow bedroom and it was one of my favourite memories of that room, ever.

And there were many memories.

Something very true

2010-09-13T05:40:00.000-07:00

image credit: weheartit

I'm going to try & change this...

My current drug(s) of choice

2010-09-13T05:36:00.000-07:00

Sunshine, warmer weather, the scent of flowers blooming, new leaves on trees, later sunsets, sandals, salads, walks on the beach, children playing outside, more energy, sleeping with open windows, fruit, the sound of crickets at night and birds in the morning...

image credit: stolenimages

image credit: acidd-queen

image credit: weheartit

{It makes me feel great and I love that.)

Spring made me realise...

2010-09-07T10:29:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I'm a few different people all at the same time.

{Ilikethat.}

Spring is here!

2010-09-02T08:39:00.000-07:00

credit: top5photos

credit: louiselegresley

credit: pxleyes

credit: umich

I actually have a winter soul.

But spring is SO welcome this year.

More sunshine, more flowers, more green and other colours.

Welcome spring, I've been waiting...

Lovely, dreamy pictures

2010-08-28T02:30:00.000-07:00

all images - credit: elisabeth toll

{LOVE.}

Work hard, have fun.

2010-08-11T11:16:00.000-07:00

credit: Arianna Belle

So I've been working hard the past couple of weeks.

And I've been really productive, go figure.

I have no idea why, but things are just.. easier to do.

I think it's because I want to finish up what I've started this year.

I want to prove to myself that I can still do this.

It's good to be busy.

A picnic under a tree

2010-08-02T13:16:00.000-07:00

We are lucky enough to live walking distance from the Helderberg Nature Reserve.

It is such a beautiful place.

Swan & I had a picnic there two Sundays ago.

I made a chicken salad, we popped a bottle of bubbly and fell asleep whilst reading in the sun.

Bliss.

The weekend was great.

2010-08-02T01:29:00.000-07:00

credit: staceywinters

Here's to a positive week filled with new things to colour my life.

escape

2010-07-31T08:11:00.000-07:00

credit: freeasterix

Often I dream of escaping to a different world.

A dreamworld. My dreamworld.

Where anything and everything is possible.

A place where even the strangest, simplest dreams come true.

Sometimes, when I try really hard, it is as if I can move myself from reality to this place... this wonderful, possible place.

I smell the grass, I feel the sunshine on my skin, I hear the far-off laughter of the people who exist there.

Sometimes, it is almost as if I'm actually really there...

But when I open my eyes, I'm back.

Here.

And it's ok to be here.

But I wish - oh how I wish to be able to slowly open my eyes and realise that I'm far, far away.

That I'm THERE.

If someone should then take my hand and pull me up from the grass where I'll be sitting, I'll SO take it and follow to wherever it might lead.

Maybe, maybe one day.

A thought for today...

2010-07-28T06:24:00.000-07:00

credit: azalcala

Sometimes, at a certain time of day when the light is just right, the temperature is just right and the sun makes you feel welcome and safe and happy,

Sometimes when you can smell the faint hint of spring and new life and green grass in the air,

Sometimes when the sound of the wind tickling the leaves in the trees or the faint rustle of my cat's hair as she groomes herself sounds juuuust right,

Then I feel confident to say that YES - I do believe in magic....

I wish for dinner, here

2010-07-26T03:57:00.000-07:00

credit: brightbazaar

Right now, right at this moment, I wish for the following things:

I wish for a warm, quiet, summer's evening (tonight)
I wish for this table, on a lakeside, set for two (husband & I)
I wish for an amazing meal, cooked nearby and served with very special wine
I wish for a wooden cottage on the lake where we can sleep
I wish for a holiday there, with my husband, just the two of us, for a week

I love to daydream!

2 years today

2010-07-26T02:42:00.000-07:00

This picture was taken on our first trip together to Nieu Bethesda in the Karoo

Today, exactly 2 years ago, Swan and I went on our first date.

It was a blind date, set up by our parents. (I know, how bizarre - not really our cup of tea, but we both felt.. adventurous, I guess!)

It was a sunny Saturday. He picked me up from my mom's house and we had lunch in Stellenbosch at a Lebanese restaurant.

It was fun; it was easy. It was the first of many more to come!

I really liked him that first day.

Now I not only like him loads, I LOVE him unconditionally.

What a man.

A bit of good advice to start the week with

2010-07-26T02:31:00.000-07:00

I can't recall where I found this image, but it's pretty awesome and I just had to post it.

Have a great week!

I love yellow doors.

2010-07-25T11:20:00.000-07:00

credit: you are my fave

Hi, I'm back.

I was taking some time to think, went on a road trip, did some star gazing, started the last semester of my year as a student and started thinking of summer (and as result eating better and exercising a bit more).

But, I'm back.

Don't you just love this yellow door? I love colourful doors and window frames.

I love bright colours, period. My favourite of which is red - always has been.

Here's to hoping for a very colourful, positive week!

On death and dying and all that goes with it.

2010-07-13T02:42:00.000-07:00

I sometimes read what this guy writes, and I think he makes a lot of sense most of the time. And today he posted something about thinking about the future which really touched me, and made me think. What he says, is true: (and I quote)

"One of the most liberating discoveries I ever had was that thinking has an insidious snowball effect. Thoughts trigger other thoughts, and if your initial thought carries even a hint of insecurity or worry, subsequent thoughts can explore it and magnify it until you’re profoundly agitated. You can end up pulling your hair out and dreading the rest of your life, just from idle thinking."

This is me he's talking about. This is what I'm doing, and what I've been doing my whole life. And this is what is exactly what I'm NOT supposed to be doing at the moment. I need to take one day at a time.

"All the suffering is in the thoughts."

(Man, you've said it! You're RIGHT. You're so, so right.)

"We can only deal with one moment at a time.

That should suit us fine, because that’s the rate at which life deals them out. Yet our thoughts make it seem like the future is already there, just ahead of us in line, taunting us while we can do nothing about it."

That is why I'm living one moment, one minute, one little bit at a time these days. Small steps, don't plan too far ahead, try to stay, live, breathe and act in the moment.

It works for me.

It stills my mind, it keeps me calm, it makes me feel good.

And I need to feel good.

credit: muddlingalongmummy

a roadtrip

2010-07-11T03:14:00.000-07:00

credit: prokureurshuis

'Nog eenmaal wil ek in die skemeraand
Weer op ons dorp en by ons dorpsdam staan,
Weer met my rek op in die donker skiet,
En luister, en al word ek seer en dof,
Hoe die klein klippe ver weg in die riet
Uit donker in die donker water plof.'

- N.P. van Wyk Louw

(Sutherland)

13 July 2010

2010-07-11T02:44:00.000-07:00

On Tuesday we'll be married for 4 months.

hazy.

2010-07-11T02:37:00.000-07:00

credit: ohhellofriend

Ok, so things have been a little.. hazy lately.

It's like I can't see/think/act straight.

So I'm trying to figure things out.

And I'll let you know once I have.

And I want this kitchen.

2010-07-03T08:58:00.000-07:00

credit: lovelyclusters

Oh and, can I have my old life back, please?

2010-07-03T08:53:00.000-07:00

credit: ohhellofriend

I want to live in a tree. I want to feel it grow, hear the leaves move in the wind, I want to smell the green, simple, solid, stable, steady, strong life it excretes and I want to be part of it.

Can't wait to see it.

2010-06-30T10:24:00.000-07:00

credit: sigmatwiomega

I once was a little girl.

2010-06-27T11:21:00.000-07:00

2010-06-27T11:15:00.000-07:00

"Men are more interesting in books than they are in real life."

--Isola Pribby, The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

credit: About a girl

I have a new hairstyle.

2010-06-27T10:11:00.000-07:00

A big, thick, blunt fringe.

I love my mother.

2010-06-25T03:00:00.000-07:00

This is my mother when she was a young woman, probably even younger than I am now.

I think she looks beautiful, and that she's beautiful, still.

She's strong and wonderful and at the moment she's sad, but she will feel better.

I love my man.

2010-06-22T08:38:00.000-07:00

I love being married.

It has only been just over 3 months, but I love it.

He is the best husband a girl could ask for, and he's MINE...

I feel blessed, very lucky and unmeasurable happy when I think about him & us.

I love you, love!

xxx

Proudly South African

2010-06-22T07:56:00.000-07:00

The Soccer World Cup is currently being hosted here in South Africa, and I think we're doing a fantastic job.

It's GREAT to live in this country.

I love every minute, and I won't ever leave. Never!

Here's to being proudly South African!

On weird dreams.

2010-06-21T23:57:00.000-07:00

So for almost a year now I've regularly been dreaming of spiders. Especially rain spiders. That's a whole different story which I'll tell you on another day.

But lately I've been dreaming of even weirder things.

Like last night - I dreamt of a big, green lizzard. I'm talking about one that looks like the lizzard in the picture above, but about 0,5m long.

It was sitting on the wall next to the bed we're sleeping in at the moment, in the spare room (our bedroom is a mess, we've had changes made to the en-suite bathroom and the whole place is covered in dust). I don't mind reptiles, and in my dream I saw this lizzard sitting there, sleeping. And I didn't want it to go away, he could sit there and sleep if he wanted to. I just didn't want him to get a fright, because then he might jump on the bed and that would just not be good.

So much for sweet dreams?

Oh and on top of 'sleeping next to a green lizzard in my mind', it feels like I'm living someone else's life.

Isn't it great.

A great view.

2010-06-18T09:13:00.000-07:00

This is the view from our front porch when the sun sets.

I love it.

Out of place.

2010-06-17T12:11:00.000-07:00

source: ohhellofriend

How to feel totally out of place in your own life:

Step 1 - Have a great life.

Step 2- Lose your dad unexpectedly.

Step 3 - Try to accept this change and try to go on with your life, although nothing will ever be the same again.

Step 4 - Repeat step 3, again, and again, and again.

I don't know if there's a step 5 yet.

What a bizarre, totally weird, weird, weird process to have to go through.

I won't recommend it.

Headache. Please stop.

2010-06-17T00:10:00.000-07:00

Headaches.

I hate them. And I have them, most of the time.

This week I'm going to figure out why I have them, why I can't make it stop, and what to do about it.

Wish me luck!

Oh, and it's also the start of my attempt to take back control of my life. Let's see how that goes...

Or so I feel... on the inside.

2010-06-14T05:42:00.000-07:00

Books.

2010-06-14T05:19:00.000-07:00

credit: book lovers never go to bed alone

"Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life." - Mark Twain

Lost on the woods.

2010-06-14T03:54:00.000-07:00

Credit: Anna Verlet

I kind of feel lost in the woods since yesterday.

A roof party.

2010-06-09T02:25:00.000-07:00

credit: youaremyfave

I wish I could throw a roof party tonight.

For my mother, because it is her birthday today.

A roof party in a little coastal town somewhere. With lots of champagne, colourful snacks, a big open fire and the perfect music.

This is a picture of her and my father when they were young and in love:

Happy birthday, girly!

Today we'll celebrate LIFE.

Chill-cat. Literally.

2010-06-09T01:13:00.000-07:00

Like I've mentioned before, Chilli is a very curious cat.

Last night she decided to hop into the fridge. :)

We sometimes call her "Chill-cat" and she's now proven that the name suits her very well!

One bag of Chilli, please.

2010-06-09T01:07:00.000-07:00

This is my cat, Chilli, in a bag.

She got into one of my bags a few evenings ago, and made herself quite comfortable in there.

She is very curious and likes exploring new places.

I wish I could carry her around with me wherever I go.

She's wonderful. Always ready for a cuddle.

She's warm, fluffy, tempramental, loveable, beautiful.

What would I do without her?

So I'm doing it.

2010-06-07T05:03:00.000-07:00

So I've decided to enter the SA Weddings Bride of the Year competition.

You can view my profile on SA Weddings here

My dad was at my wedding - he was alive and proud and happy and he walked me down the isle and it was wonderful.

All of this, exactly 2 months before he died.
I feel blessed to have had him there.

If the lightning bugs don't fly to you, go find them.

That's my own, made-up quote for the day.

Here's to a bit of light in an otherwise occasionally dimly lit tunnel.

Time off.

2010-06-07T00:52:00.000-07:00

Credit: holeinthedonut

I've finished my internship and it was great. I've met special people, done special work and for the first time in my life I can truly say that I had a taste of what job satisfaction must feel like.

For the first time in my life.

And now I have time off.

A lot of time.

I wish I could spend it in that house, above, with my husband and my mother, sister and brother and whoever they also want to be there.

I wish I could take walks on the beach, sometimes alone, when the sun has already set.

I wish I could turn around and see that house, sitting there on the beach in the water and then know that the people I love are in there.

And that my dad is ok in heaven. And that he's with us all, in our hearts.

I wish I could take away my mom's sadness.

Even for only a day.

So that she can recharge and sleep for 8 hours and eat well and get a bit more colour in her cheeks.

I wish I could make things better for all of us.

Just for a short while.

But only time can do that.

Time, of which I suddenly have a lot.

What should I do with it?

Working.

2010-06-02T12:17:00.000-07:00

Credit: phayemuss

I've been working = no time for blogging.

Finishing up my internship at a fantastic firm.

The work and the people = doing me so good.

SO good.

So I'll be back in a few days.

Awake.

2010-05-28T00:18:00.000-07:00

Credit: Janita_22

I kind of feel like this today.

At least the sun is shining in that picture.

Rain.

2010-05-27T11:22:00.000-07:00

Credit: gareth saunders

It's raining outside. It's been raining since late afternoon.

I love the rain.

I love the sound of rain.

Especially the sound of rain on the tin roof of my parents' house.

Evenings are the worse.

Especially the time between 17h00 and 19h00, because that's the time when my dad used to come home from work.

But he's never coming home again.

Never.

I hate finality.

The time of day when I used to spend the most time with my dad, was after 17h00; after work. After dark.

That's why I miss him the most when the sun starts to set.

It's really, really hard.

But sometimes the rain helps.

It's kind of like a natural type of 'tears' which comes from the earth.

The song "I'll do my crying in the rain" (Aha) comes to mind and has a whole new meaning to me.

If it rains tomorrow, you'll find me outside.

today.

2010-05-25T23:06:00.000-07:00

(photo credit: sticky mango)

Today

I want to stay in this bed. Somewhere far away from home.

Alone.

When I look out that door, I want to see, smell and almost feel the ocean.

I want books - books to write in, books to read.

And tea. And freshly made sandwhiches, when I want them.

And my cat.

I can't be bothered with the rest of the world.

Concrete.

2010-05-25T12:53:00.000-07:00

Someone once made a sculpture of me.

First, I was bodycast with plaster.

Then the seperate casts were moulded with concrete.

Little holes were made in all the bodyparts.

Then the pieces were stitched together with rope.

For now I'm still holding on; but if I should fall apart?

Please stitch me together again.

It's been done before.

In limbo.

2010-05-23T10:36:00.000-07:00

Credit: Troy Ziel

I'm not sure where I am at the moment. My life feels like it belongs to someone else.

I'm not sure if I'm supposed to start over.

Or do I try to go on?

A fundamental change like your dad dying is one of the weirdest things that can happen to you. You don't know how you feel.

Am I sad? Am I devestated? Am I lost?

All I know is that I find it hard to concentrate, on anything.

I find it hard to do things, unless I totally force myself.

My brain has stopped working in a sense.

It's like it has shut itself down, to protect me.

Am I going to fall apart at some stage?

Am I suppressing emotions because I don't know how to handle them?

Am I ok?

How am I supposed to go on with my life? It has only just started.

How am I supposed to comfort my mother, who has lost her husband.

How am I supposed to comfort my sister, who has lost her father.

How am I supposed to comfort my brother, who has lost his dad.

Am I supposed to comfort them?

Do I need to be strong for them? Or for me?

Can I let go and fall apart and just..... deteriorate into sadness?

Is that what's supposed to happen?

Is that what is going to happen, or not with me?

Everyone handles this differently, but how, HOW how how am I going to do this?

Nothing can prepare you for this feeling.

Nothing. You can't name this feeling.

I feel it brewing under my skin and I think it will show itself.

I hope the right people are with me when it happens.

Keep going.

2010-05-22T03:21:00.000-07:00

This morning I slept in, got up, made breakfast for my husband and my brother, and came home. We've spent the past week with my mom at her house (which is - luckily - just around the corner from us). It is great being with my mother, and I know I'll spend a lot of time with her, at her house, in the time to come. Just like I always did, anyway. Her (their) house will always, in a way, feel like home.

But it was nice to come home. To my new home. I've just gotten used to living in my new home with my husband. It started to feel like 'my' house, my nest, the three of us - him, me and our cats. A new, extra special family.

The sun is shining today and I went for a run. I bought a pedometer and I ran for 20 minutes, taking a few hundred steps. Running is good, and necessary.

And yes, I'm counting the steps I take each day, because I'm taking each day one step at a time. This is what coping means to me. Counting steps, for now.

I'm not going to pressure myself in doing anything I'm not ready for. I need time - we need time. And we need to be there for one another.

So here's to taking one step at a time.

I trust some of you out there will know what I'm talking about.

Credit: diane varner

Loss.

2010-05-21T05:09:00.000-07:00

My mother and father when they were younger

My father passed away on Friday, 14 March 2010. He was still at work when he had a massive heart attack, collapsed, and died. We were able to spend time with him there, in the lab where everything happened, to say goodbye. It feels so far away and so far fetched and so unreal still.

This is not a tribute - there is too much to say and my heart is too full. This is just to let the world know, in a way. He was 64 years old; a very young 64 and he was very excited about his retirement and all the things he and my mother would do together.

The funeral was yesterday. It was one of the hardest days of my life. This whole week was pretty much the hardest time I've had to go through, ever. We are such a close-knit family. And now one of us has left.

I thank God for the honour of being able to say that Andre Smit was my father. He was a phenomenal person. He was a legend. We will miss him so very much. His place will always be empty, except for the love that God will fill it with.

I'm not sure if I'm supposed to go on with my life, or if I have to start over in a sense. For now I'm focused on being there for my mother, my sister and my brother. I believe God will show us how to see to the rest.

I'll always love you dad. We'll take care of mom. I believe that you know this. I believe that you'll always be a part of our lives, guiding us, helping us through tough times. I'm your first born daughter and you can count on me to be strong.

Ria (Fielie)

Cry.

2010-05-09T12:32:00.000-07:00

Do you ever just feel like crying?

I do. Especially tonight. I'm not even sure why, but a cry would be good.

I feel sad. Hopeless. Lonely. Lost.

Hopefully tomorrow I'll feel better.

Picture by Alex Brown

Today I fell in love with a song.

2010-05-07T08:02:00.000-07:00

I heard this song on the radio while I was driving home today. I just had my last class of this semester, and I was feeling quite weird. Half of my year as a student is over, in a way, and I'm not sure how to feel about it. So it could be that my weird mood was the reason I was so open for this song to affect me - nevertheless, when I heard it, I turned up the volume and let myself be taken away - far, far away.

It's a great song. It makes you FEEL.

The fact that it plays in one of the Twilight movies is just an added bonus :)

Listen to it here:

Civil Twilight - Letters from the sky

So I danced my way into my 30's.

2010-05-06T05:04:00.000-07:00

What a fantastic way to start yet a new chapter of my life. Welcome 30's, I can't wait to get to know you better. I know you're going to give me lots to think about, lots to do, lots to appreciate along the way - and I'm ready! One thing is for sure though, I'm going to continue to celebrate life! (even if it means that I wake up with blue knees the morning after!)

This is me and my friend, Amelia, dancing the night away.

Meaning

2010-05-03T13:53:00.001-07:00

Meaning

    I won't use words again
    They don't mean what I meant
    They don't say what I said
    They're just the crust of the meaning
    With realms underneath
    Never touched
    Never stirred

    Never even moved through

    If language were liquid
    It would be rushing in

- Suzanne Vega, "Language"

Turning 30

2010-04-28T04:37:00.000-07:00

This will be my last blog post while I'm still in my 20's. Tomorrow I'll be 30 years old!

What an interesting feeling. My body is 30 years old, but my mind is still 19. It's great, but strange at the same time. I've done so many wonderful, wonderful things during these 30 years - it's been one hell of a ride so far!

Between my 20th and 30th birthday I've pretty much had a taste of the following, in no particular order:

Experienced being a Matie and obtaining a BA degree in Information Science

My first overseas trip to France

Fell in love way too many times

Had my heart broken more than once

Broke a heart or two

Did online dating and had a few flings

Overseas trip to the UK and Italy

My first real 'big' job

Several other jobs after that

Experienced the negativity of a bad working environment and bad bosses

Getting retrenched and being unemployed

Had my wisdom teeth removed

Spent time in hospital as result of my tonsils
Took more risks

Fell in love, got engaged and got married to a wonderful person!

Made really big decisions

Worked as a barlady in a genuine English pub in London

Travelled and saw another 11 countries

Played in the snow whilst being lost in a small town in Slovenia

Gained a lot of weight
Pushed a few boundries

Lost a lot of weight and got back into shape

Started running!

Felt the pain of giving up

Felt the joy of holding on

Improved as a cook

Learnt to forgive and let go
Reconfirmed my beliefs

Discovered and learnt a lot about myself and other people

Learnt to keep my mouth shut

Learnt to let the dust settle

Learnt to celebrate life with every opportunity you get

Lost a family member

Spent time in a desert - trip to UK, Portugal and Dubai

Made new, wonderful friends

Learnt to always be honest with myself and others

Moved house 3 times

Watched school friends becoming parents

Visited the Owl House

Swam with dolphins

Spent time on an island (Mauritius)

Drank lots of tequila, coctails, sherry, wine ...

Danced like no one is watching - on the stage, in the lounge, on a tiny coffee table, anywhere

Conquered the Orange River (twice)

Decided to never show my face to the sun again (go away, wrinkles!)

Stopped wearing heels

Became a student again

Started doing freelance work

Cut a fringe (more than once)

Considered getting a tattoo

Stood up for people

Got a diamond (a real one)

Saw a seahorse (it's tiny)

Said yes

Said no

Allowed myself to be inspired more

Set and reached goals

Overall improved myself as a person

Tried to live with passion so that I will always be able to say "I had the time of my life..."

So bring on the 30's! I'm SO ready. I've got my glass of bubbly in my hand, a spinning disco ball above me and my red wedding shoes on my feet - my reality has background music and I vow to keep dancing 'till I drop!!

I think I was about 5 when this was taken. I still love red.

A weekend away

2010-04-21T09:33:00.000-07:00

Vermont is a beautiful little place that lies on the coast just before Hermanus, in the Overberg. We spent the weekend there with stunning people and had a fantastic time! What a fantastic place to escape to..

A special picture

2010-04-21T08:10:00.000-07:00

Today I've received my wedding pictures from the photographer. All of them are wonderful, I love every single one (there are a few hundred!). Every picture makes me feel a specific feeling. Joy, love, excitement, nervousness, happiness... too many feelings all captured forever in pictures. This picture below, however, is a special example of how I would like to remember the day.

It was taken at about 16h00. I was supposed to be at the church at 16h00 :) But with the church being literally just around the corner, we had a little time to spare to be 'fashionably late'.

I was calm, I was happy. I was feeling in control and was drinking in every single second as if it were my last. I was sitting on the windowsill of one of the big windows in the livingroom of my parents' house, where I grew up in and where I've lived most of my life.

The house was suddenly empty, except for the photographers, my father, my brother, and I. And the house was quiet. It was as if the day was building up to this - the last few minutes of me being a single girl.

I remember looking out of the window, with a smile on my face, thinking - I'm going to remember this day forever, and in a few mintues my life is going to change forever. What a big thought for a little girl in the most beautiful wedding dress in the world, sitting on the windowsill of the house she grew up in. I feel a bit nostalgic when I look at it, but also very, very happy.

Basil

2010-04-19T05:29:00.000-07:00

I've managed to get some great pictures of Basil, our other cat. She had just woken up, the light was good and for once she didn't mind me coming closer with the camera. I think she looks stunning!

Drunk

2010-04-15T08:24:00.000-07:00

I was reading this amazing blog I've been following (the wild and wily ways of a brunette) and just stumbled across this really awesome piece of truth that I felt I must share with you.

one should always be drunk.

that's the one thing that matters.
in order not to feel the terrible
burden of Time, which breaks
your shoulders and crushes you
to the ground, one should be drunk
without ceasing. but on what?
on wine, on poetry, or on virtue,
as suits you.
but get drunk...

baudelaire

I wanted to say that I totally agree.

Introducing: Chilli

2010-04-15T07:18:00.000-07:00

This is one of our cats, Chilli. She's the youngest of the two. Chilli is lazy, lovable, playful, hungry, cute, adventurous, dizzy, confused, happy, arrogant, satisfied, peaceful and amusing all at the same time. I think if Chilli could talk, she wouldn't! But I love her to bits. She's one of my best friends these days. She sleeps on top of me at night, and when I accidently kick her off, she sleeps right next to the bed, on the floor. She follows me around, she licks my fingers, she presses her little kitten-nails into me whenever she gets the chance. She's wonderful. We spend a lot of time together. I love her and you'll be seeing a lot more of her here!

(PS: I feel I have to note here that I'm just as fond of our other cat, Basil. But Basil is not a touchy-feely cat and spends most of her time outside, hunting pigeons in the garden. I would love to post pictures and tell stories of her too, and I'll do that, once I actually catch her IN the house. :)

Instant satisfaction

2010-04-15T07:06:00.000-07:00

I'm one of those people who weren't born with a lot of patients. I do have patients, but not a whole lot. It's very satisfying to be able to get an urge to do something, and then to actually go out and do it in less than an hour and have something very pleasing to show for it :)

Other than working on translation assingments today, I prentended to be a librarian and helped out in the school library at the primary school where my mom teaches. What a fantastic way to spend a morning! I was given a quick run-down on the Dewey Decimal System (DDS), and started packing away books. It was as if the 'real world' stopped for a few hours. It was just me, the wooden trolley with the squeeky wheels filled with books, and the Dewey numbers and colour-system I needed to follow to get the books back to where they belong. I also checked in books, checked out books, recorded new books... It was fantastic and I'll definately be going back soon!

While I was on my way back home, I suddenly felt like baking something. This is new to me, as I'm really not especially fond of cooking or baking in general. Since receiving loads of wonderful kitchen goodies for my kitchentea and our wedding, that has changed though! I now sometimes feel like baking things. (Draks, are you proud?) So I stopped at the Spar and got a few necessities, including eggs. Because I knew that was all I needed for what I was about to bake. And when I got home, I took the following out of the cupboard:

"Tadaaaaa!"

I love this! It's SO brilliant. Everything you need in one, very cute box. You just add 1 egg, oil and water. And there you go. I mixed up the batter in... oh, 5 minutes? Waited for the oven to heat while spooning it into the muffin pan. A fantastic 25 mintues later I was smiling at these:

Isn't it great? They taste wonderful too. Maybe one day I'll try making muffins from scratch. For now I'm just thankful for the chubby Pillsbury man!

One hazy, autumn day please

2010-04-13T06:17:00.000-07:00

Autum is my favourite time of the year.

The reason for this is probably because I was born at the end of April. There is something about this time of year that I find magically special. Is it the cool, darker mornings, and the hazy, sunny afternoons? Is it the thick mist on the road to Stellenbosch every morning? It could be the fact that the trees are turning their leaves into all my favourite colours which make my blood pump faster - red, scarlet, burgundy, orange, amber, tangerine, yellow.

Is it because winter is creeping closer and that soon we'll be nesting around fires with fat glasses of ruby port and creamy bowls of steaming butternut soup?

It could be that I'm excited about dressing for cooler weather. Think scarves (I love scarves!), thick jackets and coats, stockings, boots, even fluffy gloves and beanies. I love to wrap myself up in layers of wonderful, comfortable clothes in a variety of vibrant colours.

Another reason could be that soon the winter rains will arrive. Days and days of glorious rain. Can you think of anything more fantastic? Fresh streams of water carrying leaves and tiny pieces of plants with them before sinking deep, deep into the heart of the earth. The sound of heavy rain on a tin roof does something to my soul. It makes me feel safe, it makes me feel invigorated, it makes me feel quietly and happily excited to be alive. There is very little that can beat that! The smell of rain is like a drug - a drug I started developing an addiction for when I was still a little girl. I remember quite a few smells from my childhood, but one of the strongest remains the smell of rain. The smell of rain in the air, when it's still on the way. The smell of rain when it flops down on dry earth. It smells green; it smells alive. It smells like home, like heaven, like happiness.

Here's to a happy autumn for all of you!

The Liquid Amber tree in our garden is also starting to change colour! I love this tree.

PS: I've just noticed that I wrote a similar post almost a year ago! I remember posting a picture of the tree before, so I went back to have a look and there it was. :) Some things never change!

Lists

2010-04-12T04:59:00.000-07:00

I really should be working on my assignment for tomorrow, but once the writing bug bites you, even for a second, and you have time? You better do something about it!

I had a look at my previous blog entry and I'm happy to say that things have happened since I've last posted! What a fantastic, blessed year it's been so far. I feel lucky and blessed. And most of all I feel rediculously happy. :) So here's what's been happening:

I've started my course at Maties, and so far it's going very well. It's a great feeling to be busy with something you're good at, and it's a wonderful feeling to be using my brain again :) Classes are great, assignments are cool, I'm even surviving the tests. I'm keeping myself motivated by staying on top of my work and preparing really well. It's all good so far :)
We got married on 13 March 2010! It was the most beautiful, most memorable day of my life so far. Everything was pretty much perfect! We had the best time, and so did all our friends and family. What a fantastic party!
Our honeymoon in Mauritius was out of this world. That place is really and truly paradise... It's so beautiful, the weather is so amazing, the sealife is breathtaking. We ate, we drank, we swam, we swam with dolphins!, we spent hours and hours in the sun and in the sea, hired a car and explored the island, we made new friends, drank hundreds of coctails and overall had the best time ever.
I've settled into our house! What a great house. I love it here. We're busy decorating and I find myself 'nesting' a bit more every day. We have big plans for the garden too.
My 30th birhday is around the corner and I'm planning a 1980's party :) Think legwarmers, tights, a disco ball, blue eyeshadow and great music!
I've started doing a bit of freelance work, and I've finished my first medium project right before our wedding. Looking forward to finishing up my logo and marketing myself so that more work can come in :)
I'm making more time to read, which I really enjoy. I read a lot on our honeymoon, and made a promise to myself that I'll read more often. I find it relaxing, I find it intruiging, it's a way of having special 'me-time' while being in the same room as someone else!

This list is growing by the day and I'll add to it as things happen.

I leave you with a few pictures of the wedding. Hope to have more this week!

I'm free!

2010-01-18T04:47:00.000-08:00

So here I am, it's a Monday afternoon, and I'm free.

No office to cage me in, no computer I don't want to sit behind, no work I have no passion for, no subconscious fear of the dreaded beast (read: ex-boss) to make an appearance and spoil my day.

I'm free, I'm unemployed, but free. With a million plans to fill my time with!

Things I'm looking forward to in the next few months:

Starting classes at the University of Stellenbosch on Tuesday, 26 January 2010. Post grad diploma in Translation, here I come! (finally)
Finishing up all the little details of our wedding.
Getting married on 13 March 2010 :)
Going on honeymoon to Mauritius straight after!
Settling into my new (our!) home.
My 30th birthday on 29 April 2010.
My first winter in our home (think loads of cosy evenings around the fireplace...)
Starting up my own freelance translation and editing business and working from home from now on.
Putting some well-overdue love into our garden!
Being creative in our house (read: making a few exciting changes)
Being more creative overall (read: making more time for hobbies)
Getting my pictures sorted and having quite a few printed for our home and finding the right spots for it.
Finding more art for our walls and finding the perfect spots to hang the pieces we already have.
Spending quality time with my forever-boyfriend but also husband-to-be in a place I can finally call HOME after a few less-than-stable months of travelling between a few homes and living out of an overnight bag.

All wonderful, exciting, positive things. I feel so blessed! This year has definately started off well and I'm determined to continue facing each day with the passion and the energy to make the best of every second!

wishing time away

2010-01-04T10:20:00.000-08:00

Wow, look at this, I'm back again, in record time!

After a tedious day at work and Day 1 of my new year detox plan I have very little energy and I'm barely clinging on to the precious holiday feeling which came so naturally a few hours ago. I don't even have the energy to put on my running shoes and get moving!

It's hard to stay positive, motivated, disciplined and nice when you're couped up in a small, dark office, doing repetitive, unsatisfying work at a company you have no feeling or passion for. I can imagine it's almost like being caught in a net - I can picture a spirited, free insect flying into a sticky web or a slippery, shiny fish swimming into a net - you're caught, you can't move, you have to wait, you have no control over the situation. That's kind of how I feel a the moment! The next 9 working days are going to take a lot of patients from my side. Patients, energy to stay positive, to stay NICE, to tolerate whatever comes my way. I just have to do it.

It's hard not to wish the time away! And it would be the worst thing to do at this stage, with time being so precious and with everything that needs to be done before I finish my job, before I start at the university, before we get married.

So, I'll just try to make the best of it. I can do this, I can do this, I can do this :)

new things

2010-01-03T09:14:00.000-08:00

I was lucky enough to start my year off with sandy feet on the bank of the Orange River, under a glowing, full moon. It was the end of a wonderful 4 day river rafting trip, and after a first shower in days, our group of friends was ready to welcome the new year with a big, festive night. I think we missed midnight by a few minutes, but the ultimate freedom of not wearing watches and not being tied down by time was indescribable. The fireworks were beautiful, the champagne a bit warm, but the vibe magical.

Maybe the last few days of 2009 were a sign of what's in store for 2010: Hard work, pushing boundries, conquering the elements, but as reward a fantastic feeling of personal accomplishment, closer relationships and having a lot of fun in the process.

A change is a good as a holiday. So I've made sure that 2010 will be a year of change.
I have ten more working days left before I'm officially unemployed.
At the end of this month I'll be a full-time student again.
In less than three months I'm getting married and in less than four months I'm turning 30 years old.

This is going to be a big year - it doesn't matter how you look at it! Definately a life-changing year.

I feel ready for all the challenges. I know it's going to take hard work, adjustments, patients. I am however blessed to have an amazing support team, and I'm very excited about what's waiting for me!

One thing I'm going to be forced to do more often is WRITE. So watch this space. I don't normally make new year's resolutions.. or no - that is a lie. I do make them and I get very excited about them, but after a few weeks they fade quite abruptly! But if I had to make a few this year, they would look something like this:

1) Eat healthy, exercise, live a balanced life
2) Write more
3) Have fun. All the time.

Let's see if I can keep it up!

Happy New Year, everyone!

A promise that I'll be back soon...

2009-08-07T04:43:00.000-07:00

... Soon! I promise. I've taken a break, settled into a new job, started running, lost weight, celebrated my 1 year anniversary with the best boyfriend ever....So, I'll be back with loads of ideas, pictures, plans, inspiration, did I mention plans? So watch this space. Now for a lazy, long weekend!

A few more snippets of my adventure(s)

2009-05-28T06:30:00.000-07:00

Herewith a few more pictures of our holiday. It's an anti-climax to be back, although I returned with a lot of plans and energy to grab the reality-bull by the horns... And it's great sleeping in my own bed again! It's been raining all day, which is wonderful. I have a longstanding love-affair with rain. And I've dug my down duvet from the cupboard.. it's lovely and cozy and wonderfully warm. I love winter. I've bought a lovely bottle of medium cream sherry, I'm planning to make some delicious comfort food later... So all in all I shouldn't complain. What a joy to look at the pictures and to remember all the fantastic times. I feel blessed. I feel lucky. Tomorrow will be the last day at my current job. New chapter starting soon. I used to hate change, but it's growing on me, really quickly. Enjoy the pictures!!

The door of a house, somewhere in Monchique village, PortugalFrom one of the beaches quite close to our resort, PortugalThe beach that borders on our resort, PortugalThe door to the secluded cave, next to the beach we've visited in the AlgarveA part of the village, MonchiqueThe Boyfriend, in the desert, DubaiHis toes are bigger than mine!A little shop in the spice souq, DubaiRichmond, from the river. White Cross pub in the background.Me and the lion, again! London.

An adventure abroad...

2009-05-27T01:25:00.000-07:00

Various parts of London, Faro, Albufeira, Monchique, Lagoa, Dubai. From 12C to a whopping 43C, all in 16 days. 7 Flights.. all in all around 40 hours on a plane (luckily not in one stretch!) Tube rides, camel rides, boat rides, exhilirating 4x4 sand dune rides. Yummy plane food, fabulous Algarve seafood, traditional Arabian food. Hours on foreign beaches, a swim in crystal clear water to a deserted cave, running through the streets of London city to catch a train. Meeting new people, making new friends, laughing, eating, drinking, sleeping, swimming, tanning, experiencing, remembering, taking more than 800 pictures to keep the memories forever. My holiday with The Boyfriend was one of the best ever, and one I'll never forget. He made it very special! Herewith a few pictures to tickle your tastebuds, more to follow soon...

Somewhere far away, from the plane...

Our resort in Portugal, Praia de Oura

From the secluded beach with the hidden cave, off the Algarve coast, Portugal - the catamaran that took us there, in the backgroudPortuguese cuizine! Sardines, sardines, sardines!On the 4x4 desert safari, Dubai
The bellydancerA camel ride! The one behind us was quite aggressive and scary!Good ol' red telephone booth in LondonA special pub in the area I used to stay - Richmond, London

The 5 pencilmaker lessons...

2009-05-26T06:43:00.001-07:00

Since I call myself Pencilgirl, a dear friend was kind enough to send me this piece of writing in a birthday card, the other day. I think it's quite special.

A pencilmaker taught a pencil 5 lessons:
1. Everything you do will always leave a mark.
2. You can always correct the mistakes you make.
3. Important is what is inside you.
4. In life, you will undergo painful sharpenings which will make you a better pencil.
5. To be the best pencil you can be, you must allow yourself to be held and guided by the Hand that holds your life
in His palm...

Something to think about!

Autumn in Stellenbosch

2009-04-29T23:17:00.000-07:00

Autumn is, and will always be my best time of year. Leaves turning yellow and orange and red, Liquid Amber and Oak trees shedding leaves everywhere, the thick mist during morning trips to the office, and the rain. Ah.. the rain. I have a deep love for rain. Rain with no wind, to be specific. The soft patter of rain on a tin roof, the joy of a secluded open window when it's raining, being able to listen to the water streaming down from the sky, through the garden, down the street. It makes me intensely happy and excited. It makes me feel at home, wherever I am. It reminds me of evenings in front of the huge fireplace in my parents' house in Somerset West. It makes me think of the undescribable joy of waking up, realising it's raining, and being able to turn on the other side and curl up in your warm, cosy, pillow-nesty bed, realising it's Saturday or Sunday, and you can sleep for another few hours. I love the colours of autumn, the smells, the cooler air, the fact that winter is coming.

* Three things that I adore right now - The Boyfriend, Basil (the cat) and the Liquid Amber tree in his garden. Happy Autumn, everyone!

29 on 29 April 2009...*

2009-04-28T23:49:00.000-07:00

So finally the day is here. My "Crown Birthday". I am excited because it's raining, I feel special because my sister went through a lot of trouble to make the day (and last night) very special already, although it's only 08h53! And 23 people (yes, 23) have already wished me a good one, between 00h00 and now. I also received the best letter from my mom that made me cry in the office. I'm lucky and blessed and I hope the rest of the day will continue to be lovely! I hope I remember it as one of my best birthdays. The fact that I'm going to Portugal in a week is also helping to make it all the more exciting. Yay! *
* Update: The Boyfriend surprised me at work! I was so happy! The receptionist called me to let me know that there was a delivery for me.. Being very anti-flower delivery (I've had some terrible flower moments..) I immediately expected the worse.. but there he was, sitting in the foyer, with a huge bunch of flowers, especially for me. It was great to see him (didn't see him last night) - he even brought me a present (a book I've mentioned a few months ago, he remembered!!) and a lovely, sweet card. Yet again I'm smitten, happy, lucky. It's a great birthday so far.

Some random thoughts on a Wednesday

2009-04-15T04:31:00.001-07:00

you came with the breeze on a sunday morning
i couldn't have know from where
you stood still while i started walking
the back of your head looked like a face from afar
you wore a red coat
it made me think of tomatoes in a wooden box
you picked the leaves from the dry tree in the front yard
i heard a train go by and tried to imagine myself on it
the sunday was green otherwise
i tried to talk to more people
i shivered later, as if someone was walking over my grave
my gandmother used to drink sugerlumps in her tea
but i didn't know her
how did this all happen?
you must still be standing in front of my house.

Abandoned Places

2009-03-18T03:44:00.000-07:00

There's a strange and wonderfully scary stigma attached to abandoned places. I always imagine what happens in places like these in the witching hours, when no one is awake.. Do creatures roam the hallways? Are their sounds to be heard? What will happen if you should sit there, and wait? Freaky, extremely freaky. Lovely pictures, nonetheless. Make sure to visit "La Valdor", Frankenstein's Hospital... Click here for the Abandoned Places website

Rob Dobi is a photographer that caught another collection of New England Ruins on camera. Not really that scary, but if you use your imagination, it could take you anywhere... Click here to visit his website